I’ve read the first book in the trilogy in a day and WOOOOOOOOW is all I can say.  The book is riddled with sexual awakening!  Be prepared to read it in one sitting or the yearning to not stop reading it.  I literally had to stop myself from opening it while stuck at a red light today.  Just wow.  Some may see it as smut or sexual sadism…and to a degree it is.  However, at its core, it is a book that tests sexual limits but also tests how far one has the capacity to open their heart to the possibility of more.  The roller coaster ride that this book takes you on does NOT disappoint.  In the end, you may need a cold shower, a stiff drink, and a cigarette…seriously.  

With the exception of #1, all of these are egregious infractions made by teachers at work.  The first one just irks the effing hell out of me because I’m neither a morning person nor am I one to like many people in general.

1.  Morning people.  Especially morning people who do not know me but apparently feel obligated to say hello at 6:30 in the morning…in the most cheeriest effing manner.  Not needed or wanted.  It would be encouraged and preferred to pretend as though I do not exist.  The sun is barely up and obnoxious children are about to infiltrate my presence for 8 hours.  Unless you’re giving me chocolate, keep on steppin’. 

2.  People who do not have a “Fave Five” on email at work.  I.E.: people who have to email the ENTIRE faculty for: an aspirin, AAA Battery, distilled water, insurance questions, and props for a class presentation.  True freaking story, all these have been mass emailed to all 200 teachers.  Seriously. Get a “Fave Five”.  Before some electronically bitch slaps you. 

3. Teachers who mass email the whole faculty because they need to see a student “ASAP!”.   Seriously?!  Email guidance or attendance because, in case you were wondering, I do spend the hours between 7:20 and 2:11 teaching the childrens.  I do not have time to check email much less send a student.

4.  People at school who need to see a student for whatever reason they deem necessary.  And they always ask so sweetly: “May I see (insert kid’s name here)?  Is this a bad time for you to send him/her to me?  He/She will be gone the whole period.”  I TEACH ENGLISH!!!!! No, you cannot see a student.  Yes, we are doing important things like improving their literacy and, you know, English skills.  

5. When someone sends a mass email to the entire faculty and someone feels the need to respond but negates to send it to the original sender to all 200 teachers get the response.  No one cares.  Really.  We don’t.  I’m sure the original sender appreciates your accolades but the rest of us probably feel like you are taking up space in our inbox.